Barack Obama honors Red Sox at White House

You can read the full story behind this picture HERE.

"Oh...it's that man teacher!"

A group of students in the Art room next to my classroom heard our raucous math game this morning and commented "Oh...it's that man teacher!" when they heard my voice through the air ducts.  It made me realize that I am indeed a minority in my school and in my profession.  My teaching partner is a male and there is a male kindergarten teacher but that is it for classroom teachers in our elementary school.  We have some males in the Unified Arts and lots of them in the middle and high school buildings.

However, that isolation is nothing compared to that felt by the men who have led this country.  I'm not commenting on the "selfie" brouhaha or the sign language boner from the recent Nelson Mandela memorial service.  Instead, I was struck by these recently released behind the scenes photos.  I cannot imagine what these men talk about...

Obama Named Country Music Entertainer of the Year

October 12, 2009

Obama Named Country Music Entertainer of the Year

Surprise Selection Shocks Nashville

NASHVILLE (The Borowitz Report) - President Barack Obama stunned the country music world today by picking up its highest honor, Country Music Entertainer of the Year.

Mr. Obama was chosen unanimously, according to the Country Music Association, beating out such favorite as Carrie Underwood and Toby Keith.

In Nashville, country music insiders were shocked by Mr. Obama's selection, given that he has only been in office for eight months and during that time has yet to record a single country song.

But Mr. Obama was gracious in receiving the honor, saying that he was "honored and humbled" by the award before excusing himself to accept this year's Heisman Trophy.

--from The Borowitz Report

"I pity the fool...."

Just makes me chuckle....

Whactcha lookin' at Rocko....

U.S. President Barack Obama and French President Nicolas Sarkozy caught admiring Brazilian junior G8 delegate Mayora Tavares’ ‘backside’ when the two leaders were taking their places for a family photo-op with junior G8 delegates at the G8 summit in L’Aquila, Italy.

I know things are never what they appear but this makes me laugh anyway...

THE ONION: OBAMA DISAPPOINTED CABINET FAILED TO UNDERSTAND HIS REFERENCE TO 'SAVAGE SWORD OF CONAN' #24

January 27, 2009 Issue 45•05

WASHINGTON—President Barack Obama expressed frustration Wednesday after members of his cabinet failed to recognize his allusion to the 24th issue of the comic series Savage Sword Of Conan during their first major meeting together.

Obama, whose upcoming challenges include organizing a massive effort to rebuild the nation's infrastructure, was reportedly unprepared for the confused silence he received upon suggesting that his cabinet "team up with Taurus of Nemedia" to secure the necessary funding from Congress.

"If my inner circle of advisers can't even communicate about the most basic issues, how are we going to tackle the massive problems our nation faces?" Obama said during a press conference. "When I tell my cabinet that getting bipartisan support is exactly like the time Conan got Taurus to help him steal Yara's jewel, they need to understand what I mean."

After receiving no reaction from the assembled reporters, Obama added, "Because a giant spider is protecting this chamber full of precious jewels, just like Congress is protecting its…. God, how are you people not seeing this?"

Obama, an avid collector of Conan The Barbarian and Spider-Man comic books since he was a child, was referencing the 1977 story "The Tower Of The Elephant," written by Roy Thomas. According to administration sources, no one in Obama's cabinet was familiar with the magazine-sized comic, though Labor Secretary Hilda Solis claimed to have once seen Conan the Destroyer.

Aides also confirmed that Obama has refused to lend his copy of issue #24 to Transportation Secretary Ray LaHood, fearing the former Republican congressman will carelessly bend or rip the pages. The commander in chief is reportedly intent on keeping the comics in pristine condition for their eventual inclusion in his presidential library.

"How am I supposed to effectively lead this nation when [attorney general nominee Eric] Holder has to stop the meeting and ask what the story of Taurus using the black lotus powder to kill the five guard lions has to do with increasing broadband Internet connections nationwide?" Obama said while vigorously rubbing his temples.

Added the president, "For the love of Crom, am I the only one here who wants to keep the U.S. technologically competitive?"

Administration officials said the incident has caused the president to question whether his staff has ever understood any of his Conan references. One such instance he is reportedly reexamining occurred after his loss in the New Hampshire primary, when Obama rallied his staff by reminding them, "There is always a way, if the desire be coupled with courage."

Although campaign workers smiled and nodded at the time, Obama has begun to seriously doubt that any of them connected the inspiring quotation to the story line in which a Kothian rogue informs Conan that it is impossible to climb to the top of the Elephant Tower because the sides are more slippery than glass

While Obama has not scheduled another meeting with his cabinet this week—a respite the president hopes they will use to brush up on the 235-issue Savage Sword series—he is expected to meet with Secretary of Defense Robert Gates on Friday to discuss Afghanistan. A holdover from the Bush administration, Gates told reporters he may have gotten off on the wrong foot with the new president, citing an occasion when Obama asked him what he knew about 1984's Secret Wars, a 12-issue limited Marvel release. Gates then handed a visibly confused Obama 1,400 classified pages on covert CIA operations in El Salvador.

Later, the defense secretary attempted to find common ground with Obama by making casual references to the comic book Spawn. But the 44th president reportedly brushed him off with an abrupt laugh, saying, "no one in [his] administration likes Spawn."

Minutes from the first cabinet meeting indicate it lasted just under 35 minutes, coming to a standstill during a discussion of minimizing public waste. When Energy Secretary Steven Chu failed to understand the president's instructions to "be like the barbarian wielding his steel to cleave flesh from bone," Vice President Joe Biden attempted to clarify the president's thoughts.

"I think what the president is trying to say here is that this is just like the time when Barney had to put Fish on restricted duty because of his health exam results," said Biden, a longtime fan of the late-'70s police sitcom Barney Miller. "It's pretty straightforward when you look at it like that."

When asked by the press corps if this week's hiccup has caused him to rethink any of his appointments, Secretary of State Hillary Clinton interrupted the president to assert that she and her colleagues have already begun educating themselves about comic books, and will soon be "an invincible team of Supermen and Wonder Women working to save America."

"Wonder Woman? That's not even Marvel," Obama responded before storming out of the press room. "Who are you people?"

"Sorry Bill, I'd rather kiss my new boss."

The more you look at it, the funnier it gets...

A-Rod Backs Stimulus

A-Rod Backs Stimulus

Says Economy Needs Shot in Arm

President Barack Obama picked up support for his stimulus package from an unexpected source today as Yankee slugger Alex Rodriguez said that he was "totally in favor of stimulus."

"Sometimes when you have to get the job done, you need a shot in the arm," said Mr. Rodriguez at a press conference in the parking lot of Yankee Stadium. "This stimulus sounds like it could be that injection."

The slugger, known to his fans and detractors alike as A-Rod, said that the U.S. economy may not seem very muscular at the moment, but that "juicing the economy" could change that overnight.

"Mark my words," he said. "If the economy gets the right injection, its muscles will bulge to monstrous proportions."

Mr. Rodriguez's words were in stark contrast with remarks made last week by another athlete, swimmer Michael Phelps, who said that the economy "just needs to chill."

"As far as the economy goes, I'm comfortably numb about it," Mr. Phelps said. "Dude, did I just say that out loud?"

At his press conference today, Mr. Rodriguez bristled when asked questions about steroid use, at one point throwing a car at a reporter.

*from The Borowitz Report

Barack Obama hates Honey Pie!

Click to embiggen. Click to embiggen.

From Mirth Canal

Poll: Obama Even More Awesome Than Originally Thought

Tops Leprechauns, Unicorns in New Poll




One week into his Presidency, Barack Obama gets high marks in a new poll, with a majority of Americans agreeing with the statement, "Barack Obama is even more awesome than I originally thought."

The percentage of voters who believe that Mr. Obama is awesome surged during his first week in office, with 82% thinking he is awesome now compared to 77% who deemed him awesome last week. And in the latest measure of his popularity, Mr. Obama receives higher approval ratings in the new poll than either leprechauns or unicorns, mythical beings that almost everyone agrees are totally awesome.

In a head-to-head contest, Mr. Obama beats leprechauns and unicorns combined, garnering 64% compared to 21% for leprechauns, 14% for unicorns, and 1% for Congressman Ron Paul.

--courtesy of The Borowitz Report

President-elect Barack Obama

Wow

Whether you supported John McCain or Barack Obama...tonight history has been made.